When patience goes wrong

When patience goes wrong

So, I’m in a small city in Texas for work and in a good mood, ready to conquer the world.  I arrived at the airport, which is smaller than the one in my hometown, in the middle of what looked like nowhere, and gleefully call the hotel to request a shuttle and the person on the other end said, “No problem! I’ll get him out right away!”  Right after I made that call, my phone randomly went dead, although it was fully charged this morning and I’ve barely used it all day.  Time passed, still no shuttle.  But I’ve been working on my patience, so I thought to myself, “Self, they’re probably on one of those every 30 minute schedules, so you’ll just have to wait till the next go round.  Besides, I can’t track the time, so I could just be tripping.”  Well, the last traveler got picked up, leaving me outside by myself.  So I went inside, and lo and behold, it had been damn near an HOUR.  So I called using the airport phone that only calls hotels, and the lady said, “He’s still not there? Ok, we’ll get him out right now.”

Uh… that’s what she said before.  So this time I stayed close by the entrance so I could see the clock.  Another 20 minutes passed.  So I went on back and asked the rental car company if I could use their phone to call a cab.  The cab said it’d be there in 10 minutes.  Well, 8 minutes later, finally arrives the damn shuttle I had been waiting an hour and a half for.  I had to battle with myself about whether or not to get on, but because I actually care about spending client money unnecessarily and because I was tired of sitting in randomness, I went on and got on, although I felt bad for calling the cab.  Well, I felt bad for calling the cab so late.  I should have called him after that first effin hour.  I roll my stuff outside, and the guy is like, “Are you the only one?”  I thought, “HELL YES, MOFO, EVERYONE ELSE IS AT HOME EATING OR AT THEIR HOTEL CHILLING!!!” But I responded, “Yeah.”  I guess the expression on my face wasn’t too pleasant so he looked at me through the rearview mirror and then avoided me until we arrived at the hotel.

So two hours after I landed, I’m finally sitting in my hotel room, wondering what to eat.  And wishing I had gotten here sooner so I could eat without missing my mickeyfickey Monday shows.  But whatever.  Happy Monday.

Let those negative folks get off the bus.

Let those negative folks get off the bus.

The truth makes you go hmm, don’t it?!  Growing up, I was always a loner.  That weird girl who was pretty enough to have friends, but still a little too smart for some people’s tastes, even teachers occasionally.  I was daring, even though I didn’t know I was–I was just really certain of myself and my knowledge.  As I’ve gotten older, I’ve become a little more mainstream–still misunderstood a great deal of the time, but I “fit in” alot more.  Well, sometimes the misunderstandings and the attacks on my character by people who either don’t know me, haven’t taken the time to know me, or who are just haters in general get into my psyche and leads to a decrease in daring.  I go into hands off mode, even though I know something is wrong.  I keep my mouth closed, even though being passive is not generally who I am.  Sometimes that gets me down, but sometimes, I realize that it’s just as daring to let unimportant people talk to themselves, to save my breath and my words for someone who can have a productive conversation or even debate, if needed.  I will never think I’m always right–but I am confident that I’m someone everyone should want on their brainstorming, strategic planning team.  And that fact doesn’t depend on anyone, not even those who disregard my value.

To achieve greatness, you just need to let those naysayers or know-it-alls who don’t know a damn thing get off the bus so that you can keep it moving.

I am Nada Dee, and I am working on me.

I am Nada Dee, and I am working on me.

So!  If you know me really well, you know I can’t stand the spotlight.  Especially if I have to open my mouth.  Some think it’s really hard to believe because I’m always serving in leadership capacities, but I’ve always been kind of a behind the scenes person.  Well, I’ve realized that in my life–at work, in social settings, and in community settings–I really need to get over this dislike of public speaking and meeting people cold (without any introduction) so that I can walk through any doors that God may open in order to let His light shine through me.

So yesterday, I attended a one-day seminar at Emory about being an effective presenter, and boy, was I blessed.  Vicki Flier Hudson is the bomb, and this class is definitely worth the time and mulah.  At the beginning of the day, we discussed what our barriers were and how to overcome them.  We were told that in order to tighten up our outer game, we have to deal with the inner game.  I had never really asked myself WHY I don’t like all eyes on me.  Or at least not long enough to come up with an answer.  So when I was asked yesterday, I kinda just gave a blank stare.  And after the talk, I think it’s really just fear of the unknown and being self-conscious of what someone may be thinking as they size me up.  #1 thing I took from the class yesterday: “I am Nada Dee, and I have something valuable to offer these people.”  I will begin reciting that mantra before I have to stand before an audience and speak about something.

According to my teacher, I have the skills.  I am personable and I connect well with my audience, make great facial expressions (everyone knows that! lol), sound like I know what I’m talking about.  But I find myself giving off negative body language because of my apprehension and low self-confidence of being in front, and I don’t project loudly enough sometimes.  So knowing my weaknesses and going equipped with new exercises to deal with these, I think the class was an awesome launching pad for improvement.  I’ve also joined Toastmasters, and I have resolved not to turn down any more opportunities to share who I am and what I have to offer to anyone.  Whether it be speaking, singing, or whatever. One day I may even like getting up and talking to groups of people.  Oh how unstoppable I will be then.  Happy Friday!

Gender Roles and the State of the Black Family

Gender Roles and the State of the Black Family

Today I’ve had lively conversations about the following media:

http://www.youtube.com/user/shanelcooper

http://www.crosswalk.com/singles/11608840/

Take a look!  I’ll be back later when I have a minute to sit down and really delve into my thoughts and share.

Update :: October 9, 2010 :: I promise I’m coming back.  I just have so much to do!!

The Big Day!

The Big Day!

So today was the big day – my first talk at an international research conference. I was excited, nervous, and sleepy all wrapped up into one! I’m thankful that my niece stayed up until after 12:30am (US time) to make sure that I was up by 6:30am (Berlin time) because I was having trouble getting out of the bed this morning! 🙂

The session began at 8am and my talk was scheduled for 9:30am. By the time the presenter right before me was up, I was giving myself my usual “you’re the expert…you’re the greatest….don’t panic….it’ll be over soon… you can do it….” speech. Lol. Then, the moment of truth – I heard them call my name followed by “Tanjala was awarded The Transplant Society Young Investigator Award/Travel Grant…” And then it was showtime.

Before I knew it I was up talking….things were going well – no fumbles, talking at an ok pace, no problems, halfway done…then my mouth got super dry!! Like super super dry! Lol. Part of my brain said “drink the water on the podium” but the OCD-part of my brain said “no you can’t drink the water…what if that is somebody else’s water…what if the lady forgot to change the glass!!?!?” So, I didn’t drink the water. But I finished up the talk with no fumbles, in spite of the dry mouth problem. Lol. Afterwards, people were congratulating me on the award and said that I did a great job. So yay! 🙂

I then attended another session where I recognized one of the experts from Harvard as a keynote speaker. I was sitting there listening and all of a sudden I heard the Harvard expert say “….these findings were similar to those presented in this morning’s 8am session by the Johns Hopkins study……” and I was thinking “dang I thought I was the only one presenting a study from Hopkins this morning…oh wait, THAT’S ME…HE’S QUOTING OUR STUDY…an Associate Professor at Harvard is quoting the talk I just gave 30 minutes ago!!!” After the session, I introduced myself to him and he responded “Oh, I know who you are…I enjoyed your talk this morning….you guys are doing some great work…..”

In my best Derwin Davis voice “Oh yeah, that’s what’s up!!” 🙂

Needless to say, my morning turned out to be a great one, and I’m glad the “business” part of my trip is over! Now I can relax and enjoy the remainder of my trip.